1. I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?
我相信人应该就象每天都是最后的日子那样生活，这可以解释为什么我没有干净衣服——因为，得了吧，谁在生命的最后几天里还想洗衣服？
注：充分利用自己的长处，享受生活。
2. Smile and the world smiles with you, fart and you stand alone.
微笑，世界和你一起微笑；放屁，你独自站在一边。
注：人们愿意和你一起分享快乐，并不一定愿意分担你的痛苦。
